Dear O.J. Simpson

In the words of Fred Sanford, "You big dummy!"

You couldn't just lay low and live out the rest of your life, could you? Assuming you didn't kill those two people (You can tell me. You killed them didn't you. I won't tell anyone), you couldn't just lay low and mind your own business. No, you had to go out and do stupid stuff.

...Like write a book called "If I Did It." Ummm, brotha you were acquitted of the vicious murder of your ex-wife and her "friend." (Yeah they were probably fuckin, but what of it?) Why would an innocent man then write a book talking about how you would have killed the mother of your children?

...Like try to hide your financial assets from the Goldmans so you wouldn't have to pay that civil judgement. Too bad the people you dealt with were as shady as you, and with no Johnny Cochran around to pull a Jedi Mind Trick defend you, your ass got caught up.

I know what happened. You saw what happened to R. Kelly and thought you could get away with that shyt. Hell, they had a tape of that brotha peeing on the girl, everyone saw it and they STILL could not get a conviction. All they had on you was a glove that did not fit. However, you forget one critical detail. The girl R. Kelly peed on is dumb as a box of rocks, probably from a bad home, still trying to wash the smell of urine off her soul, crying herself to sleep on the pile of money she was paid to keep her yap shut BLACK. If she was white, R. Kelly would be UNDER the jail.

So now its over. I feel sorry for you, like I do for anyone who will no longer get to see the light of day or enjoy freedom. Ultimately though, you brought this on your damn self. Keep your booty shut.

Love always,
Brian